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world-prisoner

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PostSubject: love in islam   Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:32 pm

sallam alikom i really likes what she said so i post it to u guys

from islam online

By Aisha Tahira Stacey
01/11/2004


Coming from a Western or European background, we often equate love with the stereotypical images that we see in all forms of media. The pouting woman waiting breathlessly at home for husband to appear to “love her,” alternatively the career woman who throws off the shackles of the workforce to return breathlessly home to her waiting husband. Sex sells, and the print and visual media take advantage of this fact. Sex sells, and businesses in all corners of the world will do anything to make an extra dollar. Sex is not love, and the word ‘love’ has, unfortunately, lost much of its true meaning.

We drive to work past the giant billboards selling cars and clothes and laundry detergent. The billboards all have one thing in common a pouting woman who says with smoldering eyes “drive this car and attract women like me”; “wear this brand of clothes and women will want you more then the clothes.” We open the newspaper to see advertisements for exotic destinations; the people appear to be happy and “in love.” The television and movie screens tell us that if you consume this product you will be desirable, your husband or wife will “love you.” Drink brand X and fall in love, wear brand Y and have all fall in love with you.


This is not love, this is an advertising ploy. Marriages fall by the wayside because husbands and wives find that they cannot live up to the expectations that they impose on themselves and each other. The images are impossible to emulate simply because they are not real; they come from the minds of advertising executives, not from the natural order of our lives. Our senses are assaulted almost every waking moment by images of what the media feeds to us as a normal lifestyle. These images are not normal, and the lifestyles that they portray are in no way a reflection of how men and woman should live together in a normal, healthy relationship.

Islam, on the other hand, being the natural way for human beings to live, employs no trickery or gimmicks. Love in Islam brings men and woman together with strong bonds that tie couples together with the rope of Islam. [And hold fast all of you together, to the rope of Allah (i.e., this Qur’an), and be not divided among your selves, and remember Allahs favour on you] (Aal `Imran 3:103). A marriage based firmly and soundly on the Qur’an and the Sunnah should suffer none of the pangs of insecurity and subterfuge that abound in marriages whose role models are the pouting woman and muscle bound man found in all forms of media. Marriage in Islam is a contract between two people, a man and a woman, by which they agree to enter into a [halal] relationship for the sake of Allah Most High.

It is a relationship that binds them to each other through all the tests and trials of this life, through hardship and ease. [Verily along with every hardship is relief] (Ash-Sharh 94:6). It should be a relationship whose sole purpose is to worship, praise, and thank Allah Most High. If love—the tender blissful feeling of being in love—is present in this relationship, then it is an extra blessing from Allah.

Marriage in Islam is not based on whether we find our partner desirable or whether he or she contributes a great deal of money to the family. Marriage in Islam is a partnership. Two people, working as one unit. One unit striving for Jannah, longing to secure themselves a place in the shade of Allah. Love in Islam is a [halal] marriage secure in the knowledge that the wealth and adornments of this world are but illusions and that it is in the Hereafter that our real lives will begin.

[And the life of this world is nothing but play and amusement. But far better is the house in the hereafter for those that are al-muttaqun (the pious). Will you not then understand?] (Al-An`Am 6:32)

If we examine our thoughts on love and marriage and endeavor to renew our intentions to have a marriage for the sake of Allah Most High, we will, [in sha’ Allah], find that we are no longer blinded by the subtle advertising that invades our lives and eats away at our [iman]. Shaytan (Satan) works in devious and treacherous ways and loves nothing more then to put enmity between a husband and wife. His work is made easier by the fact that we are so easily deceived. Before we realize what is happening, the seeds of destruction have grown into an evil tree.

We begin to think and worry because our marriages are not what we see on the television or read about in the latest release novels. Our minds are invaded with thoughts that are contrary to the natural order of Islam and the universe, and our insecurities lead us to long for unattainable and unnecessary ideals in our lives and marriages. We have grown complacent in our commitment to our marriages and to our Islam, where as Shaytan is ever watchful and eager to guide us to the path that leads to nowhere but eternal Hellfire.

A marriage in Islam is about more than ‘love’; love in Islam is about more than tender feelings and smoldering sexual desires.


Through our commitment to Islam we should be able to return to an era where love and marriage are synonymous. Where a marriage is a partnership, a bonding of two people that, like ripples on water, moves ever steadily outwards to encompass the ideals of an Islamic community. The bonds of marriage should tie us to each other, to our families and children, to our brothers and sisters in Islam, to the worldwide Ummah. If we put our love for Allah first and our own desires last, then we should find ourselves in a relationship that no longer falls prey to the subterfuge of Shaytan. We should cling tightly to the rope of Islam and recognize the fact that life is not always sunshine and roses but that this [dunya] is a place of testing and tribulations. [Do people think they will be left alone because they say: “We believe,” and will not be tested] (Al-`Ankabut 29:2). We should bear our tests with patience and gratitude, take refuge with Allah, and take comfort in the arms of our spouses.

[And We will most certainly try you with somewhat of fear and hunger and loss of property and lives and fruits; and give good news to the patient, Who, when a misfortune befalls them, say: Surely we are Allah's and to Him we shall surely return. Those are they on whom are blessings and mercy from their Lord, and those are the followers of the right course.] (Al-Baqarah 2:155–157)

Aisha Tahira Stacey writes for Qatar daily publications the Times and The Penninsula. The author is currently working on a series of stories based on the lives of the Sahabas and a series of historical stories for children
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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Sun Jan 13, 2008 8:58 pm

Dear Sister, Assalamulaikum,

I agree completely. The West gives an outward appearance of females, and men then fall for it. We at least will all agree that women are treated as material objects in society. That is why Hollywood, well at least it's trying, is trying to provoke some thought in the masses. There have been a number of successful love stories that are based on emotion rather than the physical, but can you show me one movie, just one movie where the male and the female are at odds in their appearance (Besides Jack Black's Shallow Hal). I'll reply more to this later, inshallah. Right now I have to go study!

Walikumsalaam!

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proudmuslimah



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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:42 pm

I also agree with this article, especially in regards to women. We are plagued daily by these images of what society believes is beautiful and desirable. This in turn causes young girls to go to extremes to emulate these images. The number one negative result is eating disorders starting as early as five years old. It is shocking. I have seen beautiful little girls starve themselves, or purge in order to be super skinny like the models they see in the magazines and on television. What surprised me is when I was living in North Africa, what was desirable and beautiful in women was totally opposite than what they portray in the West. Women are more curvy and full, and society loves it. In just seven months years of insecurity melted away from me and I became extremely proud of my body and the way I look. Also Islam taught me that Allah (swt) made each and every person unique and beautiful. We should never aim to alter His creation. It would be insult to Allah (swt).

In regards to love it is no accident that there is now a 50% divorce rate. Young people are raised on this fairy tale that when you are in love birds sing, and everything is right with the world. On the contrary, relationships are difficult. It is a journey with ups and downs. It is the downs that will bring you closer together and solidify the relationship. People are no longer willing to work through their problems. They take the easy way out...divorce.

Also, many marriages have lost sight of Allah (swt). A man and a woman should come together in marriage to build a home that will grow closer to Allah (swt). To be married is to complete your deen and the family is the foundation of Islam.
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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Fri Jan 18, 2008 5:06 pm

Assalamulaikum Proudmuslimah,

I agree 100 percent. I would also like to say something in addition to your post. Looking at this 50 percent in divorce rate in the West, particularly in the United States, you can see that hijab in Islam is important. It's become widely disregarded as a 'fail-safe'. I think all men can say frome experience, that what attracts us at first glance is a female's appearance, then her virtues. When we become more aware of the person's habits, we start to dislike them. Islam teaches us wisdom when in choosing a wife. First comes virtue, second beauty, and then third comes wealth. Alhamdolilah, it is one's personality that should attract us most. Hollywood's been trying to teach America general rule, "Love comes not from looks, but from one's heart." So true, yet so cliche. Hollywood never puts on show for what they would consider the 'ugly'.

Hijab I feel has brought husband and wife closer together, the fact that it helps the man (who happens to be more lusty in nature) abstain from sexual thoughts about other women; and that it helps women abstain from sexual thoughts about other men. Imagine, if you were the husband or the wife of your spouse, and you started to 'feel' for someone else. It is not the fact you start 'feeling' for someone else it's the fact that you start feeling limerence. There's a teacher at my school, whose brother has recently had a difficult time with ihs wife. Yes they are from the Western world. Her brother's wife told him that "Don't get any funny ideas, you can stay here, but don't think I love you." Instead the wife has decided to live a life at the bar, drink, and flirt with other men--though she does come back home at times. Unfortunately, they have four children. Not all of America is like this contrary to the common "Eastern Hemisphere Belief". My teacher's brother, unlike his wife does feel for his wife and feels obliged to take care of her and their children. I wish them all the best, but this is something I fear for our world.

When you get married, you simply complete half your deen. You complete half your job as a Muslim--you're half way to Jannat'al Firdos. Marriage is sacred, the point is to create happiness in your life, to bring new lives into the world so you can a part of you live on, but at most life is about helping each other get closer to Allah. Marriage and love is nothing short of Allah, Ameen.

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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Sat Feb 02, 2008 5:20 pm

thx 2 all
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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Thu Mar 20, 2008 5:49 pm

world-prisoner wrote:
thx 2 all

You are always welcome Smile

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Zulfiqar07



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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:20 pm

Salaam
proudmuslimah wrote:
In regards to love it is no accident that there is now a 50% divorce rate. Young people are raised on this fairy tale that when you are in love birds sing, and everything is right with the world. On the contrary, relationships are difficult. It is a journey with ups and downs. It is the downs that will bring you closer together and solidify the relationship. People are no longer willing to work through their problems. They take the easy way out...divorce.

Also, many marriages have lost sight of Allah (swt). A man and a woman should come together in marriage to build a home that will grow closer to Allah (swt). To be married is to complete your deen and the family is the foundation of Islam.

I absolutely agree with what proudmuslimah has said. Marriage has lost its true meaning, its sanctity. Marriage is an extremely powerful commitment, for which to continue, both, the husband and the wife have to adapt to solve the problems they face. I think a lot of people in the world today, falter, when it comes to commit. They don't fully understand the value of the commitment nor the consequences of breaking it. What would be a perfect marriage? To me, i don't think there is such a thing. There always need to be some sacrifices made for the good of the whole, which, more than often people aren't willing to make.
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PostSubject: Re: love in islam   Sat Apr 05, 2008 8:57 pm

thx for replay


and muslim alway love for allah and hate for allah
even if they hate them selve cause we hate to lie or to proud infront of others and we try to prove our love to god even if it was againts our bad needs
and this is oppisite of those said we love people we die for them
and they love the anime too
well i believe that i hate setan cause he is anime and i hate people who fallow setan and kill inoccent people and this is what god tell us in quran
he said that he hate the fasad فساد في الارض and i hate that too
cause i hate for what allah hate
peace Very Happy
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